Mark Paul Gosselear was on the Jimmy Fallon show last night and came out in full Zack Morris gear.  I don’t know what is more amazing: the hair, the shoes, the phone or the fact that he keeps a straight face.  It’s kind of eerie that he can still look like he did in 1993.  Watch and enjoy:

You have to check these quotes out. These are no joke. The dude is special.  As one of us (also a special dude) has remarked about Tyson, “Dumb idiot, total idiot or just completely crazy. Possibly all three.”

Here are a few of the best:

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

“I guess I’m gonna fade into Bolivian.”

“I can sell out Madison Square Garden masturbating.”

“I have some pain I’m gonna have for the rest of my life. So every now and then I kick your f**king ass.”

Man, we don’t even know where to start with this one.   They say that the children are our future…  That is a scary thought if this is exemplary of suburban America.  This poor girl’s future is sure to be filled with hour long psychiatric sessions and Xanax.  Her brother seems to be destined for a career in proctology.  His preoccupation with the butt raises a few questions.   Enjoy…

Sometimes we have to bring you some comic relief that will strike you as so ridiculous that you will ask the proverbial question: But Why? Just ask this guy, who attempted to ante up at the black jack table with a dime sack when he ran out of chips. Wow.

HAAP, but don’t puff puff bet.

Here is what is going to happen to you.